I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
