Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
