the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize