Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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