Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
