just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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