Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
