It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
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