So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
YAS. BRING CRAB.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
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