i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
you will always have a special place in my vag
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
