I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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