the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
