Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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