he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
