That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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