i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize
