i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
