ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
