your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
