I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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