I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize