I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Randomize
