Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
