ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Randomize
