Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
