toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Randomize
