i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
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