I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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