Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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