Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize
