I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
MIDGETS
????
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Randomize
