they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Randomize
