so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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