I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
PANTIES FOUND
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