Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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