Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
