spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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