Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
