Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
