In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I am naked and annoyed.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
