I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
