I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
