absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize