I wish they made helmets for livers.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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