Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
i believe in u and ur pee
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