Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
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