i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize