cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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