you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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