All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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