i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I have aggressive nipples.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
These tits shall not be calmed
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
