honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Randomize
